....para tristadas, tontadas y guarradas pinche aqui....y en todos lados pinche, porque lo pinche no se quita tan fácil, pus ni que fuera gripa...

14 de abril de 2009

alprazolina con ranitidam


"cualquiera puede ser un no borracho".



y esque cuando se carece de talento, o al menos este sigue escondido despues de siempre, uno tiende a autobuscarse un defecto para convertirlo en virtud.

dos meses largos pero tragables, llenos de esto y vacíos de aquello, meses en que la autoconvivencia se volvió insoportable, en que el spm tuvo miedo de un desaire y mejor pasó de largo, a decir verdad yo tampoco me hubiera acercado sino fuera porque vivo conmigo, y qué decir de las cabezas que no aportaban relevancias, mejor encerrarse y seguir la única ruta sin caminos alternos, casa-oficina-temploalvicio-casa, limitarse a dibujar sonrisas en los otros esbozando una en mi cara, es bien fácil hacer muecas y escupir el tan sonado: "gracias, que le vaya bonito", y esque creo que bonito es mejor que bien.....dicen los que dicen saber.me que soy bien rosa para este lugar, yo sigo diciendo que nadie sabe.me nada....

re.tomando, pinche tiempo ha sido mierdoso, aunado a mi castrecés’ (de castrosa) esto se vuelve una bomba vomitiva, en serio se extraña vomitar bilis cada mañana cuando a ésta se le olvida que existo....que el existencialismo, que sólo fumar y no hay, la naturaleza está escasa y no he llegado al punto de rentarme por eso, que ya no estas chava, que la gente me cree un robot, que las ganas de no hacer nada, que me querían de su puta mientras se enamoraban XD, pero esa es otra historia, digna de.....qué se yo, (como tip a mis 3 lectores, hay cosas que se piensan, pero nunca, nunca, nunca....deben ser dichas) que la vida sigue, que la rueda gira y mas dichos que a la gente le encanta restregar cuando uno no los ha pedido....

sigo en mi papel, aunque la chingada esté de copiloto, sonrisar' aparte de los vicios es lo único que me sale bien, es más fácil fingir demencia a dar explicaciones de porqué no se parlotea como todos los días. Y en la búsqueda de mi yo, me topé con la que más me acomoda, leía, fumaba, escuchaba música real y tomaba la victoria que todos quieren...y sí, tomo porque me gusta, porque puedo hacerlo y porque literalmente vivo en un expendio de alcohol.....dicen, que hay cosas a las que no debería tener acceso, para comodidad de los demás, no precisamente mía, que para no pensar tanto, ni inconformarme, ni refutar nada, que lo "normal" en este condado a mi edad es querer casarse, tener una casa, saber hacer arroz, trabajar, ganar bien para comprarse un bonito coche, que si piensas vivir de leer o escuchar música....niña por eso no pagan!!; que cotizar en infonavit, crear antigüedad, verte bonita siempre aunque el espejo ni tenga ganas de verte, y demás blablerias que no caben dentro de un cuadro de blogspot....

y dentro de la habitualidad aparte de mi autismo pirata y el déficit de atención a las pequeñas cosas, porque seré la envidia de los monjes tibetanos pero no necesito pensar en blanco para poner mi mente de ese color, simple y así, me es fácil largarme al nunca jamás hasta que un “alguien” me jala de regreso a la tierra prometida, hago hincapié en que no creo en las promesas hasta que se vuelven un hecho y para mi la tierra prometida sigue inexistente…..decía, en mi ociosismo’ (de ocio) descubrí que lo único que me separa del mundo aparte de lo dicho es la hora del ritual uñero (de uña), llámese efecto acetona a falta de....lo mismo, como sea, ese momento en que lo único que importa es no salirte del contorno, sin pintar el dedo y concentrarte en que quede perfecta, donde los ríos son esmalte, los arboles borlas de algodón y la lluvia es acetona pura, quedando como lima el pavimento del camino al país de las maravillas, donde no hay luces que se estiren, ni fuerzas que te succionen a la par de con quien estás hablando y en un pestañeo te das cuenta que nunca fuiste a ninguna parte, donde no hay monstruos que se disuelvan y conviertan en sopa de ojos que debes comer para no morir de inanición, ni voces, que sabes que están pero no sabes de donde salen ni porqué te hablan de cosas que no van en el contexto, ni enjambres que salgan en vez de gritos por su boca y las ronchas que los piquetes provocaron en su garganta no sean capullos esperando a reventar, son las mariposas mas feas que haya visto alguna vez, si, si, esos lugares donde ni los alucínes e imagínes (de imaginar) tengan cabida.....

a mis dieciquince tengo que esconderme a fumar marlboro para que la que me parió no me tire el típico sermón de que con este ritmo de vida no duraré mucho, qué parece que mierdearme la vida lo hago intencional y....cosas que las mamás no captan, por eso y muchas cosas más, la mamería' (de mamá) no llegará conmigo ja...

a donde quieres llegar sandra maría?





"Se requiere de un talento especial para ser un borracho.
Se necesita resistencia.
La resistencia es mas importante que la verdad".








Pd1. Y espera su serotonina caer del cielo cual ludovic para entonces ser lo que le llaman normal en su código postal.....(música gloriosa de fondo)

pd2. Post patrocinado por laboratorios Pfizer y SSA.

Pd3. y como dice la canción, no me consuelan ni la mota ni las pastas ni el alcohol, en efecto, no me hallo....turururu (8)

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Distress ferments the humors, casts them into their right channels, throws eccentric redundancies, and helps cosmos in those secret distributions, without which the association cannot subsist in its vigor, nor the typification dissimulate with cheerfulness.

Anónimo dijo...

In everyone's time, at some dated, our inner throw goes out. It is then break asunder into passion beside an encounter with another hominoid being. We should all be indebted for those people who rekindle the inner spirit

Anónimo dijo...

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